On Llamas and Other Current Events
My toddler seems to think that bed time is a negotiable part of our day, and she specifically seems to think that its negotiable while she's standing in the middle of my living room screaming that she's not tired and she doesn't need to sleep. You see, she fears the dark. We have a specific routine we have to do or she will wake up at usually 3 am screaming because her room is dark.
Which is fine, we're accustomed to it and honestly everything is better than being woken up at 3 am.
Part of our routine involves this little stuffed llama that she's slept with since she was six months old, which again, hasn't been a problem because we hardly ever deviate from her schedule.
When the snow storms hit Texas and Oklahoma, our apartment complex lost water and power for around three days. Because we have two small children who need water and power, we made the decision to go to grandmas house until we got one of the two basic life needs back.
On our way out the door, my toddler grabbed her stuffed llama and we ran out into the cold.
Three days later, we arrived home. My toddler hadn't slept at grandmas house and she was so tired she put herself to bed. I wasn't mad.
Until the next day, when she realized her llama toy wasn't anywhere. It wasn't in the car, it wasn't under the bed, it was gone.
We had left it at grandmas house.
Which meant he was safe, but 3 hours away.
We resolved the problem, but I won't go into that because I feel that it deviates from my thesis. (Wow, I hope my High school English teacher is proud of me for reaching that conclusion myself.)
My toddler isn't old enough to understand that she doesn't need to fear the dark. She doesn't understand that God is good and that he is the one who created both the Light and the dark and that He gives good gifts to His people who He loves.
What she is old enough to understand is that she's scared, and this stuffed animal helps her not be quite so scared. I think that a lot of us have this "when I'm scared I" mentality.
You see we are people desperate for a Savior.
And I don't mean desperate in a jovial tone. I mean yearning, and destitute for a Savior. I mean Longing with our whole beings.
We. Are. Desperate. For. A. Savior.
But at some point, our Savior got too far away. He did't understand the problems that we are having now, and His words no longer apply to us and our lives.
So we had to go to other things. Drowning out our NEED for rescue with our little "things". Our projects, our educations, our opinions, our politics, our conspiracies, fancies and dreams.
Which are all valid. I love my education, opinions, conspiracies, dreams and fancies.
But they aren't helping with my need for a Savior. Only one thing can fill that Savior shaped hole in my heart.
There is one thing that will help that, and that is the wonderful power of Jesus.
When He left the earth to go back to heaven, he said "MY peace I will leave you. Peace not as the world gives, but my peace." He has overcome a world of pain and fear.
Without Jesus we are hugging a proverbial stuffed llama and saying, "This cures my fear of the dark."
It's hard not to give the world so much mental real-estate. I struggle with that.
My anxiety is my soul crying out for my Savior. My worries are my soul screaming for my Savior. My moments of doubt are my soul crying out for my comfort from the only one who can give it.
"For God didn't give us a spirit of fear, but a spirit of power, love and a sound mind." 2 Timothy 1:7
~Rachel
